I’ve come to realize parenthood means constantly having a knot in your throat. First, it appears because you can’t believe this REAL, completely amazing, tiny person is yours. Then, it creeps up because you’re so exhausted and you don’t know the last time you took a shower. Then, because those big, beautiful eyes lock with yours and you know you’d do anything in the world for this child. Then, because this sweet, sweet child now has teeth, and uses them while nursing. Then, because you are dropping your little one…
I’ll never forget the moment. Every hair on my arm stood up. My face flushed red and my heart pounded so hard I felt it in my throat. It was one of those “Mama Bear” moments we don’t see coming, but hits us hard and fast. It’s instinctual and raw, and there’s not a whole lot you can do but breathe and hope you can defend yourself and your cub without the claws coming out. My two oldest boys were young (and #3 and #4 weren’t on the…
“But my big sister looks out for me, just like she would do if she were here.” Jeba Pandian and her daughter Sophia have written a touching, positive and hopeful children’s book reflecting on the beauty of Sophia having a guardian angel, her big sister in heaven. While the topic is heartbreaking, Jeba and Sophia (and the bright, inviting illustrations by Cynthia Meadows) bring you into a world of hope and happiness that can be so needed after a loss. While their hearts will always miss her, the belief she is with them and watching out…
I stood in front of the display for an unbelievably long time this morning, trying to decide if I needed to buy a few packs of sandwich crackers. They were BOGO and my boys love them, so it shouldn’t have been such a difficult decision. But I kept telling myself there was still a pack at home and I should get something else so we’d have a variety of snacks in the pantry. I even walked away, stopped halfway down the aisle and came back. Why was this such a huge decision?? Good grief, woman. If…
He had no idea where we were going. I’d just told him we were going away for the weekend to celebrate our anniversary. I suggested a few things to pack, but tried to keep it vague so he wouldn’t figure out where I was taking him. I have to say, the surprise element was a fun factor leading up to the weekend. He kept asking for hints, so I gave him a few to mull over. It had something to do with “us.” It was within driving distance. We’d never been there…
I’m asked quite often if I still keep in touch with the biological parents now that my surrogacy role is over. I’m happy to say we do keep in touch and it’s an incredibly beautiful friendship. We knew right away we were the perfect match. The conversations were easy and comfortable, and each step of the process was done together and with absolute happiness exuding from each of us. I loved that Jeff and I both felt an immediate connection with both of the bio parents. It was exactly how I’d imagined…
“We’ve come a long way And, baby You know I hope and I pray That you believe me When I say this love will never fade away” ~Ray LaMontagne “You Are The Best Thing” It’s hard for me to even imagine what my life would look like without Jeff. He is, without a doubt, THE perfect match for me. Our personalities, our outlooks, our viewpoints, our dispositions, our goals … all mesh so well. I’m not really sure how we got so lucky, and yet at the same time…
I find it difficult to write about myself without worrying it sounds arrogant. I’ve made different choices than most but, to be clear, I don’t think my choices are better. Just better for me. I had my two girls very young. I’m sure at that time most people thought my life was pretty much spelled out for me, and it was for a long time. I became a nurse and worked to pay for the “normal” life with my significant other. I always knew something was just missing. That kind of life didn’t make sense to…
I’m pretty confident there’s one in every family. The “easy one.” The one who almost always follows the rules, does what is asked of him (usually the first time!), and doesn’t demand your attention at every waking moment of the day. While our house is in a constant state of activity and noise and movement, there is one who is the calm in this crazy family storm. He helps when we ask him to, he does his homework without our nagging, and he is generally the one not in trouble. 🙂 Sometimes at…
Isn’t it crazy how a song can come on the radio and your mind is instantly whisked away to a specific time or place or person? It’s as if these moments in your life (both the major and mundane) are somehow connected to a song or album, and can give you a fleeting return ticket to your earlier life when hearing them again. Music has always had that power with me. When I hear “Carolina in my Mind” I’m transported back to summer camping trips to North Carolina with my daddy. “…